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CARE - FRONTING not CONFRONTING

Encourages - Comforts - Heals By Listening - Mirroring - Informing Resulting In Love - Oneness - Trust – Growth

MIRRORING
• Mirroring – verifying understanding of ones statement
Preface with something like “Is this what you mean?”
Use different words that imply the same idea
• Avoid words that imply:
Judgments – I think, Wrong, Bible Says (let the Bible study time speak this to all), not right, mistake, …
• Avoid Conclusions - You should, You need, you have to, …

I NOT YOUR
• Use an " I message" that reflects personal experience or failure that is relevant
• Avoid the "You message" that may appear threatening, blaming or judging which results in a defensiveness

WARM NOT SHARP
• A warm tone and open posture avoids defensiveness and denial
• Sharpness implies dissatisfaction and judgment

COMMUNICATION SUGGESTIONS

What and When of an Action:
• Speak of it and not to the actor ( no You …)
• Limit to the observation rather than a conclusion (no Why…)
• Describe but not judge it (no Good, Evil, …)

How to improve or restore:
• Information not advice (no Do …)
• Options not answers (no Must …)

Let the life coach/counselor get to the Why, Advice and Answers
For intake interview, advice, prayer or encouragement contact HOPE Teen Challenge at 607-786-3669